Stardew Valley's Hobbit Hole Mod Might Destroy My Life Again

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Stardew Valley destroyed my life once, which isn't bad going really. I'd wager that most players who've sunk serious time into the chilled out farming simulator have had their lives destroyed on two, three, or even more occasions.

What I mean is, sometimes you get so obsessed with a game that you do nothing else for days or weeks on end. It can affect your social life, your work life, and everything else. I at least remembered to eat and shower during my Stardew seshes, but pretty much everything else went out the window. Sleep? No need. Pub? Not tonight, I've got turnips to grow and a witch to romance.

I don't regret that period of life. It gave me a great appreciation for the genre, and eventually I played so much that it put me off returning. That's a good thing. I'd milked all the enjoyment I could from this particular indie cow, and I moved on. That's a far healthier gameplay loop than, say, getting re-addicted to opening Ultimate Team packs for real money on EA Sports FC every year. I've cut myself from that now, too, but I don't look back on that period with as much fondness as I do Stardew.

Still, I vowed never to return. My time as a farmhand was done, apart from occasionally tuning into some Farming Simulator esports competitions. They're fierce. But a mod that adds Hobbit holes to the game may change everything.

If you've ever read a Ben Sledge article, it's probably mentioned The Lord of the Rings. It's resplendent on my author profile, my tattoos in my picture on the site, and pretty much everywhere else in my life. I suffered through reviewing Gollum. I built my own mine in Return to Moria. I wrote about Fallout earlier this week and over half the words were describing niche behind the scenes details from The Lord of the Rings films. Sorry not sorry.

Adding Hobbit holes to Stardew Valley, even unofficially, is enough to draw me right back in. The Hobbit life is idyllic. Smoking pipeweed, drinking beer, and eating plenty of good food in stunning green environs is pretty much the dream. To roleplay that in a video game? The perfect relaxing vibe.

I thought I'd have to wait for Tales of the Shire to roleplay my Hobbity dreams. I even wondered if the game was dead after all the layoffs at Weta's gaming division, until it coincidentally tweeted this week as I was planning this article. But I suspect the Hobbit simulator is a long way off, and a Stardew mod will fill the gap perfectly.

Now this mod is just a reskin for your farmhouse. That's all. The rest is in the roleplaying. I'd love a mod that made you shorter, gave you great hairy feet, and reskinned the whole of Stardew to look like The Shire, but this isn't it. There are no secret ring items, no fireworks or birthday parties, and certainly no adventures. This is just Stardew Valley, except you go home to a Hobbit hole each night.

That's enough. I can roleplay the rest. Or not, if I don't want to. The magic of Stardew is that it lends itself to your own fantasies. A city kid moving to the country is a fairly universal, or at the very least relatable, calling, and isn't dissimilar to my own plans of retirement to my own purpose-built Hobbiton, Green Dragon and all. Adding in that one touch of Lord of the Rings, that nod to Tolkien, and it all makes sense. It all fits. The factory could be run by Saruman, trying to take over. Your friends could be distant Hobbit relations. You can avoid the annoying fishing minigame because Hobbits are scared of water.

This simple mod has got me even more excited for Tales of the Shire, a game that's undoubtedly years away. But it's also got me back into Stardew Valley, a classic that deserves revisiting after all these years. I'm ready for it to ruin my life all over again, this time Hobbit-style.